Q I have a question regarding pornography usage and browser histories. As a matter of courtesy to my wife (and anyone else who may use our devices), I always clear the browser history on whatever device (computer/iPad) I may have used to view pornography. I’ve always just assumed that she doesn’t want to see “Teen Anal Adventures” or “Lifestyles of the Deep and Fisted” when she logs on to the browser history. However, the other day, she noticed a blank browser history and berated me for “keeping secrets” from her regarding my masturbatory viewings. I thought I was following proper etiquette by erasing the browser history. Now I’m not so sure. Your thoughts? —Wondering Husband Always Clears Kache
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And we both know that ain’t gonna happen, right?
So keep clearing your browser history, WHACK, which is the courteous thing to do. And ignore the wife when she tries to make you feel guilty about watching porn, because that kind of inconsiderate, controlling, smut-shaming behavior shouldn’t be tolerated. (My response presumes that your porn consumption is moderate, WHACK, and that you’re not neglecting the wife’s needs for emotional and sexual intimacy in favor of alone time with your laptop. If your habits are immoderate and/or you’re neglecting her, then your wife has every right to be furious—at you, WHACK, not porn.)
Q Staying with friends of friends in their guest suite and discovered a “funnel gag” sitting on the floor next to the bed. (I took a picture and did a Google Images search!) My best guess is that it fell there after its last “use,” as it was on the side of the bed nearest the wall and it could have been overlooked during “cleanup.” Do I say something? What’s the etiquette in a situation like this? What do people use these things for?!? —Guest Asks Graciously
Even if a strap-on is a joint purchase, even if it was purchased for the pleasure of the person “on the receiving end,” it’s not uncommon for the wearer of a particular strap-on—the person on the giving end—to come to regard the strap-on as an extension of her body and bond with it. Such was the case with your ex. And even if your ex had allowed you to keep that strap-on, STRAP, odds are good that your new girlfriend would also have seen that old strap-on as an extension of your ex’s body and insisted on it being replaced.
