QI am a hetero female, but one of my biggest fantasies is for a guy to dress up in women’s underwear. Not full-blown drag, just a teddy, fishnets, and some heels. He doesn’t even have to act like a woman. I just want him to parade around a bit, and just for me. I’ve had the ovaries to bring this up only twice to men I’ve been with. My first boyfriend was game, but I was so insecure with my sexuality at the time that I let it go. My second boyfriend found it degrading and wouldn’t do it. I think there are two things holding me back: (1) I’ve never even heard of this fantasy, and that makes me feel like a creep. Is there a name for it? (2) I know the first time I will giggle with joy and I’m afraid that will be a big buzzkill if my hypothetical future boyfriend thinks I’m laughing at him. —Lingerie Without a Man
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Your fantasy probably lacks a name because it isn’t that odd or a whole lot to ask. And this fantasy makes you more sexually and romantically marketable than you seem to realize, LWAM. The world is full of men who aren’t gay, aren’t into drag, and aren’t into full-blown cross-dressing but who are turned on by the idea of wearing the girlfriend’s panties and/or a little lingerie. A lot of these men are with women who barely tolerate their kinks. The single ones, on the other hand, are out there looking for a girlfriend who is turned on by the thought of a guy in panties, teddies, fishnets, and heels. Post a few explicit personal ads on online dating sites—kinkster and normster—and I promise you’ll be flooded with responses from guys who want to put on a show for you.
- Have you checked out xdress.com? Think of it as your own personal porn stash before you find a boyfriend, and your favorite online shopping destination after.
QI was watching a porno featuring a hot gay threesome. Two tops double-penetrated a bottom. The odd part: the tops shared a single condom! I’m wondering how safe this might be. It certainly doesn’t seem safe. —Dubious in Phoenix
A couple of questions: Do I reach out to him again? Did I overreact? —Left in the Lurch
Close by telling him that you’d be open to dating—a real, noncasual relationship—if things don’t work out with this other girl.
