I think I am going to change the regular formula on this entry. There will be no story at the end because I did hear one of the best break-up stories on Friday night so what I will do instead is add that to the regular entry and then plea for people to submit good date stories. The inbox is flooded with bad date stories and I am beginning to think that everyone is totally capable of fucking up a relationship or date so to change it up a bit I will post some good stories once they start coming in. So what is the reason for the fucking up when it comes to a relationship? There are a billion reasons but it always comes back to one person wants out and they are so close to wits end that they will do anything to get out. A dishonorable discharge? Awesome! Yes please (I’m talking about the Army here, not one of those discharges when you go to use the bathroom the morning after a one night stand. There is nothing honorable about those either). Anyway, one of the people just feels stuck, their mind’s eye is looking forward and there is a feeling of impending doom. All those warning signs, patterns, and changes made during the relationship all of a sudden make the magic 8 ball in your head rattle a bit and when the triangle floats to the window ‘All Signs Point To No”. Shake your head again and it reads “Not Possible!” One more time and we see “Seriously, Get Out Of Here!!” Then one more time for good measure…. and the 8 ball reads “Ask Again Later” which only allows the same answers to repeat again and again and cause a person to just stand there shaking their head. Yeah, it’s enough repetition to drive a person insane so for the sake of sanity, just give the talk and move on. The talk is always important. That is when the real lessons are learned but before the real lessons are learned, both people have to know themselves. If you are on the receiving end it is stated why the relationship not going to go any further and how no one involved is going to benefit from the other person. If you are on the giving end of things then you obviously have a the same train of thought (no one here is happy) but you just saw it first. It sucks because you have to explain that case to the other person and sometimes they don’t want to listen. Well, for the sake of your sanity and time you have to make them listen and make all points clear. It’s kind of weird, all you want to do is a simple action (leave) and yet you have to explain your case like it is the trial of the century. It actually might be a good idea to come into the room before giving the final words with a dry erase board, some files, a few witnesses, and some surprise evidence, as everyone loves a twist or two in the case.
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Alright, so I did some research on myself recently. Turns out that according to the Chinese Zodiac I am a dog and then if you fuse that with the newspaper/ whatever dot com sign I am a Pisces thus making me a Water Dog. All characteristics check out pretty good. It’s the first time I have ever researched it but yeah, it is all pretty much true. It kind of made all my fuck off, let’s just be friends, you’re completely crazy, wow! I really like you speeches make a lot of sense. And, as true to the Water Dog, the weather is awesome, it is a time of change and the back deck along with some cold ones and a lot of newly burned cd’s are waiting my arrival. Submit those good date stories, not asking for a marriage story here but just make it aware that there are those in Chicago capable of getting together and having a good night. Please submit the story right………………………………… here.
