QMy question is one of etiquette. My lesbian wife and I live in an apartment. The noise pollution between flats can be pretty bad. Anyone who lives in the building is aware of this, and keeping noise down after certain hours is a common courtesy. I wouldn’t play loud music after a certain hour, or let doors slam, or break out the drum kit. If any of these things happen after around 11:30 PM on a work night, I don’t think I’d feel any qualms about going around to whoever is being inconsiderate and asking them to keep it down. But what about noisy sex? My neighbor’s girlfriend is pretty loud during sex. If the racket were being made, say, before midnight, I could bear it. It would be gross, because I think he’s slimy and he has a terrible hipster mustache, but I wouldn’t be writing to you. I’d just cope as best I could and try to fall back asleep. But what about sex at crazy o’clock? Is it OK for us to pound on the wall and ask them to keep it down? What’s your opinion? —Sleepy Lesbians Next Door
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AI happen to agree with Robert Lopez, Jeff Marx, and Jeff Whitty, creators of the Tony Award-winning musical Avenue Q, on the subject of apartment living, thin walls, and noisy sex: “You can be as loud as the hell you want when you’re makin’ love.” Or, in this instance, your creepy neighbor with the hipster mustache and his girlfriend can be as loud as the hell they want when they’re makin’ love. But you and your wife—their annoyed neighbors—can be as loud as the hell you want when they’re making love. You can pound on the walls, SLND, make your displeasure known, scream and yell, etc.
QI was in a monogamous relationship with a woman for two years. We split up and remained platonic friends. Months later, on a drunken night, we had sex. At that point, neither of us had slept with anyone else. After we had sex that night, the sexual lion was out, and I slept with two others (using protection, of course). Now my ex-girlfriend and I may get back together, and she has asked the question: Have I slept with anyone else? So far, I have managed to avoid answering and, yes, we are currently sleeping together. Do I tell her? —Blow Jobs and Rights of Privacy
ACloseted gay men don’t use colored T-shirts to send messages to out gay men. They use Craigslist.
