“It has to be amazing,” Theron Denson says, “to walk around the earth and be Neil Diamond. He’s just very loved and has legions of fans. Girls must be approaching him all the time.”
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The bar upstairs has been transformed into a spa. Some women are flopped on massage tables; others are having their nails lacquered. As Denson makes his way across the floor, the house manager grabs the microphone. “Ladies, I need you to do a countdown,” he says. “The Black Diamond in five, four, three, two, one–make some noise!”
“Hot August night and the leaves hanging down, and the grass on the ground smelling sweet,” Denson sings in a sober baritone, his tremolo not quite as dark or rich as Diamond’s. “It’s Love, Brother Love’s Traveling Salvation Show.” A few dozen women crowd around the three-step-high stage, hooting and jiggling.
Denson thought he might be able to work a few of his own songs into the Black Diamond set, but the first time he tried, it didn’t go over too well with the promoter. “When she was writing the check, she said, ‘We hired you to sing Neil Diamond songs.’ I learned from that moment, you gotta give ’em the Neil Diamond,” he says. “As the old adage goes, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.”
Denson makes his way through a sampling of Diamond’s greatest hits, from “Forever in Blue Jeans” to “I’m a Believer.” He closes with “Sweet Caroline,” of course. Girls sweep their arms from side to side and sing “bomp bomp bomp” on the chorus. Then, from the speakers: “That was good. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you rehearsed it.” It’s the voice of the real Neil Diamond, from his live Stages box set. And the cheers coming through the speakers are from a crowd in Las Vegas.
