Lead Story
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In May a judge in Yonkers, New York, dismissed the most recent of many lawsuits filed by a public-access TV host known as Glendora; this one alleged that a cable-company employee had “poisoned” sponsors against her. Of the 360 pages of largely handwritten documentation she offered to support her suit, the judge wrote, “The record should reflect that the overwhelming majority of the material submitted is completely irrelevant, consisting of multiple copies of a 60-year-old photo of the plaintiff with Bob Hope, sheet music, commentary about the impressive geographic expanse of the City of Yonkers . . . details of how she ‘writhed’ while her chauffeur shot insulin into his abdomen, [and] an account of a near-miss with a deer on the Taconic State Parkway.”
Animals Getting It On
More people who apparently weighed their options and decided to get shot: John Amos of Martins Ferry, Ohio, was charged with obstruction of justice in March after he allegedly staged an attempt on his life in hopes of avoiding his upcoming trial for rape. Authorities said Amos’s alleged accomplice tried to back out, but Amos threatened him, they fought over the gun, and ultimately Amos successfully guided the barrel to his own stomach. And in Baltimore in May, 20-year-old David Briggs and 22-year-old Philip Anderson told police they’d sustained minor gunshot wounds during a gas station holdup. When security-camera footage showed otherwise, they then claimed they’d had a friend shoot them so they could avoid fraternity initiation rites at their college. But this story fell apart too–among other problems, Briggs wasn’t even a student. Soon a third account emerged: Anderson reportedly admitted that Briggs arranged the shooting to avoid being sent to Iraq with the national guard; Anderson apparently took a bullet to bolster his friend’s story. (A military spokesperson confirmed that some guardsmen in Briggs’s battalion would soon be headed for Iraq but said Briggs hadn’t completed enough training to go along.)
Oops
Art accompanying story in printed newspaper (not available in this archive): illustration by Chuck Belshwender.
