Q Do you think post-op transgender people have any obligation to tell their lovers they were once the other sex? —On the Fence

I believe she’s depressed. She refuses to get help, saying that if only I would do this or that, she’d be more willing. But I do this and that, and she’s still not interested. After a lot of talking, she suggested that I find a girlfriend. However, she set conditions that were unrealistic: she wanted to meet and approve of her before I slept with her; and I could only see this other person late at night, with the wife’s permission, which would only be granted after all other family obligations were satisfied (kids in bed, bills paid, trash taken out, etc). I preferred a “don’t ask, don’t tell” approach. She then withdrew the idea entirely. I proceeded to meet and sleep with several different women anyway, and I’m now seeing one regularly. Sex is enjoyable again.

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Q You are a terrible person who shouldn’t be allowed to give advice to anyone about anything. Whose idea was it to give an asshole faggot like you an advice column, anyway? You’re a stupid piece of shit who doesn’t know anything about sex or the human heart, and you will regret everything you’ve ever done and every word you’ve ever written once you die and have to stand before your creator. —God Hates You

A Maybe so.

“I actually look good. I dress good, am clean-shaven, bathe, touch of cologne—yet 30 million women rejected me, over an 18- or 25-year period. That is how I see it. Thirty million is my rough guesstimate of how many desirable single women there are.”

Sodini wasn’t taking advice from me, however. He was getting it from R. Don Steele, author of How to Date Young Women: For Men Over 35. The book was sitting on Sodini’s coffee table in a video he posted to the Web. Steele apparently traffics in—and profits from—instilling false hope in losers like Sodini. (“Immediately improve your success with women!” Steele says on his Web site, steelballs.com. “Everything is 100% guaranteed money back.”)

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