Q I met my girlfriend about three months ago on a social-networking Web site. The pictures made her look attractive and in shape. We texted each other nonstop for the first three months. This past weekend we met, and she didn’t look anything like her pictures. However, we did still have sex twice. I’m about to start my freshman year in college, and I realized upon returning from my orientation that I don’t want to be tied down going into school. Breaking up with her will break her heart into pieces. I have no clue what I should do. —Epic State of Confusion
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For the record: anyone looking for sex partners online is allowed to post flattering photos of recent vintage. People are free, of course, to post misleading photos of mysterious provenance. But those who post misleading photos have no one to blame for their hurt feelings but themselves.
If I may paraphrase the caption under a famous New Yorker cartoon: On the Internet, nobody knows—or has to know—you’re a dog.
There may be a handful of gay guys out there who won’t want to date a guy with one ball, and they’ll make their excuses and refrain from seeing you again. But so long as you’re not an insecure, tormented bag of slop always bemoaning his half-empty sack, it shouldn’t interfere with your love life.
Then, once you’ve shown the girlfriend that you’re capable of sleeping with other people without being irresponsible, unsafe, or insensitive, WSID, she might—might—give you the OK to fuck another girl sometime. The odds are even better if she fucks another guy with or in front of you and realizes that, just as she had sex with another man without feeling any less attracted or attached to you, you could have sex with another woman without feeling any less attracted or attached to her.
