Q I’ve written before, but I didn’t hear back from you—probably because my e-mail didn’t contain flogging or santorum or whatever. But I won’t be IGNORED, Dan.
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This man, my first love, is the worst person in the world for me. Yet I’m in love with him. I have ALWAYS been in love with him. He wants me to leave my white-collar husband for him, a very blue-collar guy. I live in a nice home in the suburbs; my first love lives in a small apartment in the city. Five months after we began having sex with each other, my current husband found out. Instead of leaving me, he has turned into a different man: extremely loving and attentive. He says this experience has made him realize how much he loves me and that he doesn’t want to lose me.
A I’ve read what you’ve written before, SCIL, but I didn’t respond because I didn’t have much to say. I still don’t. I had the same reaction reading your e-mail today that I had reading all the other e-mails you’ve sent. My reaction is a little selfish, and I’m a little embarrassed to share it with you. But you keep pressing me, SCIL, and so here it is: THIS BITCH CAN GET LEGALLY MARRIED AND I CAN’T?!?!
That said: if your current husband doesn’t mind being cheated on, if he can put up with your affairs and wants to put your children first, then I think you should stay with him for the sake of your kids. Again, if you leave your current husband for the love of your life, SCIL, it won’t be long before you’re cheating on your third husband and preparing to uproot your kids yet another time. I know it, you know it, everyone out there reading this knows it, even your current husband seems to know it.
If you can’t say that and you decide to keep fucking the ex anyway, CRAP, you wouldn’t be the first lovesick dumpee who agreed to enter into an FWB arrangement with an ex. If the short-term rewards (all that hot sex) and the potential long-term payoff (getting back together) make the risk seem worthwhile, then keep fucking.
