QWhy am I such a slut? —Girl, Corrupted
Don’t buy into the sexist double standards, GC. So long as your sex life isn’t negatively affecting your relationship(s), your health, your friendships, your family life, your classwork, or your career, GC, you aren’t doing anything wrong. Don’t let shitty, sexist people make you feel like you have to slap a shitty, sexist label on yourself for the crime of enjoying sex while female.
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Have fun out there, GC, be thoughtful, be safe, be considerate of the feelings of others and of your own. And remember: What works for you now—slutting around in the sex-positive/reclaiming-the-shit-out-of-that-word sense, i.e., a lot of healthy and rewarding sex, a lot of happy sex partners—may not work for you always. Don’t look back on this part of your life with shame or regret if or when you elect to downsize your sex life, i.e., less sex, fewer sex partners/a lot of sex, one sex partner. Do what’s right for you, eliminate the risks that can be eliminated, mitigate the risks that can’t be eliminated, and don’t worry about what other people think.
QI’ve been reading your column for years, and I feel like I should know your answer by now, but I’m stumped. I’m a man. Recently I discovered Omegle, the online chat site that allows you to “talk to strangers,” and I’ve had some fun posing as a lesbian. I would talk to women my own age (mid-20s) about life, love, and, of course, sex. Many times, like 99 percent of the time, these chats included role play or sexy chat. We would both be masturbating on our respective ends, and from what I can tell, I am pretty good at writing this stuff. I want to be clear that this was just chatting. I wouldn’t trade pics, since I’m missing the goods the women I’m chatting with are interested in, and it’s certainly not fair for me to accept pics without being able to provide them. I don’t keep in touch with my chat partners after our chat is over, and I am pretty sure everyone is satisfied.
QIs drag done by cisgender straight men for “humor” problematic? I thought drag was mostly about humor. I am acquainted with a bi trans woman who thinks this is offensive, and at risk of further offending her, I haven’t asked why. Maybe you know? Haven’t we come a long way if straight men are comfortable enough with their sexualities to dress as women? —Not Feeling Offended
