Q I am a girl and I am stuck. My boyfriend and I have been dating for nine months, and I only recently told him I can squirt. When we would have sex before, I would tell him to stop before I came because I didn’t want to squirt. Now that he knows, he thinks it’s really hot that I can and wants me to do it. But I can’t seem to get to that point anymore. I have a vibrator, and when I masturbate, I can squirt no problem. But even with me, or him, stimulating my clit while having sex, I just can’t do it and I don’t know why. —What Should I Do?
Stop thinking about him, WSID, and start thinking about yourself.
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You trained your body not to come when you were with your boyfriend, and it’s going to take some time to undo that training. But if you can squirt when you masturbate alone, WSID, you can squirt with your boyfriend. And here’s how you can get there: Masturbate with your boyfriend in the house but not in your room. Then do it with him in the room but not in the bed with you—and, hey, put a blindfold on him if you’re self-conscious about him watching you. Then masturbate with him in the bed with you blindfolded. Then masturbate with him in the bed with you not blindfolded. Then masturbate with him in the bed and not blindfolded and touching you, then with him in the bed holding you, then with him in the bed helping you.
And, yes, a short-term hookup can turn into a long-term relationship, HOPE, but not if you’re treating your hookups like shit (because they’re only hookups!) and not if you’re willing to let the people you hook up with treat you like shit (because you’re only a hookup). Treat your hookups like people you might actually see again—like human beings with human feelings, not just human holes and/or poles—and you might actually see them again.
Finally, HOPE, some people treat hookups like shit—only after they’ve come, natch—because they want their hookups to understand that they’re not interested in a relationship. That’s not just assholery, assholes; it’s completely unnecessary assholery. If someone was kind enough to suck your dick or fuck your brains out—if someone hooked up with your ass—a little kindness and consideration isn’t too much to ask. If you’re worried that your hookup might misinterpret “kindness and consideration” for “I want to be with you forever,” tell them—gently and directly—that you’re not interested in a relationship.
A Thanks for sharing, OLDMAN.
