Read Aimee Levitt’s story on the migration of Chicago hipsters from 1898 to the present.

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Whether funny or defensive, the responses turned out to be revelatory: you guys basically told us what “hipster” means at the moment. So thanks. And sorry in advance to the people we call out (including ourselves) for so obviously fitting the profile.

All right, so, hipsters definitely have tattoos. Preferably of illustrations from their favorite works of children’s literature.

Say, “But I don’t have any tattoos.” RT @Chicago_Reader Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react?

— Heather Kenny (@heatherkenny) September 18, 2013

Quoting Tyler, the Creator is the only thing more hipster than Tyler, the Creator riding a can of PBR over a moon that’s being howled at by a wolf that’s screen-printed on a vintage T-shirt.

@Chicago_Reader quote Tyler http://t.co/XonQhpH5Aq

— Brandon Wall (@Walldo) September 18, 2013

I’m pretty sure that just means you were a 90s hipster.

I was into indie rock, dorky glasses etc. in 90s BEFORE it was “hipster” RT @Chicago_Reader Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react?

— katherine of chicago (@kofchicago) September 18, 2013

THE absolute perfect mock-hipster answer. Kudos.

Sorry I don’t know what that is. I don’t own a TV. RT @Chicago_Reader Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react?

— Michael W. Sphar (@mikesphar) September 18, 2013

See. I knew someone would threaten violence.

“Where do you want it?” http://t.co/OsmxolMIXM RT @chicago_reader: Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react?

— MrJM (@misterjayem) September 18, 2013

Hipsters aren’t into JC. Beard envy.

@Chicago_Reader Prove them wrong by bringing up Jesus.

— Nathan Cotter (@NathanCotter) September 18, 2013

Oh, you knew mustaches were coming.

“@Chicago_Reader: Someone calls you a ‘hipster.’ How do you react?” I give them an evil sneer as I twirl the ends of my handlebar mustache.

— TheBeverlyBrewmaster (@BvrlyBrewmaster) September 18, 2013

Hipsters: aloof.

RT @Chicago_Reader: Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react? – too cool to react bro. I might exhale.

— !RYAN FUCKING MEGA! (@RyanMega) September 18, 2013

Hipsters don’t have kids, wives, or (I’m filling in a blank here, sorry) reliable employment.

With surprise, since I’m 38, married and have a kid. RT @Chicago_Reader: Someone calls you a “hipster.” How do you react?

— Scott Smith (@ourmaninchicago) September 18, 2013

Yeah, but hipsters sure like beer, @JimTheBeerGuy . . .

@Chicago_Reader I am a fat old dad so I’d be pretty confused

— JimTheBearDad (@JimTheBeerGuy) September 18, 2013

“Honesty” is such a lonely word.

@Chicago_Reader with a shrug. I like underground music, craft beer, and have horn-rimmed glasses. They’re not pulling that out of the blue.

— jongraef (@jongraef) September 18, 2013

Bingo.

@Chicago_Reader say “yes, I am a hipster.” Because we all know hipsters don’t admit that they’re hipsters.

— Dylan Yost (@fender4life1425) September 18, 2013

Burn.

@Chicago_Reader Like any true hipster, I ignore them and go back to reading my Chicago Reader.

— Robert Loerzel (@robertloerzel) September 18, 2013

After this piece hits stands, maybe not for long.

@Chicago_Reader “People still use that word?”

— H.P. Lovecats (@lefttheprairie) September 18, 2013